The Power of YES

N-O.

Two little letters that carry such incredible weight.

The result of making my “absolute YES” list is that I’ve had to say a lot of “no”s. That’s not an easy thing for me.

Like many women coming from a corporate professional background, I can say that “no” hasn't often been a word that was rewarded or respected.  So I'm reframing the concept in my mind.  The learning curve of this past year has taught me that I have to have self-imposed limits or I will have myself over-capacity all the time. Having spent some time in that position this year, I’m adamant now that it won’t happen again. So, I’m following the advice of my TVW co-author, Laura Allen, and the AssistU philosophy, and sticking like glue to my “absolute YES” list - whether it’s easy or not.

There are some things that I’ve had to give up – not because I didn’t want them or they didn’t do anything for me – but because, when push came to shove, they just weren’t on my “absolute YES” list. And although I agonized over many of them, in the end I found that it was right for me to give them up. As I extricated myself from commitments that were burdening me emotionally or from situations where I wasn’t as invested as I would want to be, I could actually feel the weight lift from my shoulders. I felt free from over-capacity.  It is certainly true that we all need to "check in with ourselves" and to "trust our own instincts".  (Thank you Dawn.)

It’s been difficult for me to do this, but I am a stronger person and a much better business-woman for the effort. I can say that I absolutely believe in the power of the “absolute YES” list.

Note: On this journey, I found an article that outlines some very useful tips in understanding WHY it’s so hard to say “no” - and how to overcome the difficulty. It’s worth the read.

Comments

[Gloria Luzier]

Margot -- YES! uh, NO!! I mean, yes, I, too, have had to learn the importance of using that powerful word, "no." This is a tough one for me, but staying mindful of that capacity issue you mention is a critical component. Thanks for this reminder!

[Dawn Goldberg]

I'd love to hear what your Absolute Yes list is, but I also understand that it might be too personal to share.

I created a new Absolute Yes list at the end of last year, and with all the changes in my life this year, it's actually invalid. I'll be focusing on creating a new one soon (very, very soon, I promise!).

Good for you for saying no, and, more importantly, feeling good about it!

Love,
Dawn

[Barbara Bond]

Yes!!! Way to go, Margot!
Love, Barb